Choppy? Sometimes, Yes!
You may have been told to avoid "short and
choppy sentences"; nevertheless, Ethel Wilson uses just such
sentences for effect. The sentences represent the glances of two
women who have just boarded a train.
"Even in the confusion of entering the
carriage at Salzburg, Mrs. Montrose and her cousin Mrs.
Forrester noticed the man with the blue tooth. He occupied a
corner beside the window. His wife sat next to him. Next to her
sat their daughter of perhaps seventeen. People poured into the
train. A look passed between Mrs. Montrose and Mrs. Forrester."
—from the story, "We Have to Sit Opposite" by Ethel Wilson.
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