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  Tips for Writers by Brad Hyde (September 17, 2006)
 


Short and Choppy? Sometimes, Yes!

 

 

 

You may have been told to avoid "short and choppy sentences"; nevertheless, Ethel Wilson uses just such sentences for effect. The sentences represent the glances of two women who have just boarded a train.

"Even in the confusion of entering the carriage at Salzburg, Mrs. Montrose and her cousin Mrs. Forrester noticed the man with the blue tooth. He occupied a corner beside the window. His wife sat next to him. Next to her sat their daughter of perhaps seventeen. People poured into the train. A look passed between Mrs. Montrose and Mrs. Forrester." —from the story, "We Have to Sit Opposite" by Ethel Wilson.

 

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